The Axe

I got laid off today. I and a large number of people that I work with were invited to a meeting this morning and when we arrived there was a lot of awkward silence and a small balding man read from a piece of paper that we were no longer needed. I kept waiting for the part where he told us about the all inclusive St. Regis resort and spa package included in the severance, but he must have forgotten.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/10/07/AR2008100702604_2.html?sid=ST2008100702063&s_pos=

However I did not forget to load up on stolen office supplies before I left. So take that armed guard at the door who went through my belongings, you didn't look inside my lunch box where I hide all of the loot!

All I am doing right now is trying to think, What Would Ferris Do?

Update by Matthew:

Just so ya'll know how i treat my lady right, i decided to avenge her Countrywide death through a series of covert sabotage operations. for those who don't know, here's a little background. for an unknown reason i was hired on as a member of the IT department for CW, despite the fact that my computer skills are what some people would refer to as barely above a John McCain level. But regardless, as part of my job i sit in a cubicle all day and make sure that company owned computer software is sent to the right people, and removed from the wrong people.
Translation: lets just say that the small balding man who read Lindsay the news of her lay-off today should not be surprised if tomorrow he starts his computer only to find out that he no longer has any software (including e-mail) to do his job.
phase two of my vengeance plan is in the works, i am fully prepared to recommit myself to a favorite jr. high hobby. copper thievery.