Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Supa Human

Can you guess what Matthew and I are for Halloween?

A) The best looking boys from the 8th grade? (you know the ones who developed early and got all the babes because they could man up and grow mustaches and acne.)

B) Perverts?

C) or are you not sure that this is a costume and are more worried that we are going to shiv you and steal your camera?

Unfortunately there are no winners to this Halloween guessing game because I am not sure what the original thought was behind these poorly executed costumes. All I know was that I spent Saturday night in my in-laws backyard with a drawn on mustache and no real explanation. Should I question why I dressed up like a 14 year old boy when all the other self respecting girls my age are dressed as a sexy (you fill in the blank: kitten, nurse, pirate...)?

I guess the only other person that needs to do more soul searching than myself is the owner of this curiously pink Honda Del Sol that I spotted in the SCC parking lot. Judging by their vanity plates we can assume they are known as "Supa Human"

Supa Human if you are still out there and have found yourself reading my blog, then look me up. I'm the strangely feminine boy in a hoodie with a penciled in mustache. I think we can relate.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

How Our Dinner Table Rolls

Does this look like dinner to you?
If you come to my house around supper time, it will.

This blog post was started by a very ambitious Lindsay, but along with a few other household projects tonight, she was unable to finish it because of a severe case of the crankies. She asked me to wrap up this post in her stead, and like my two biggest heroes -- Sir Lancelot and King Aurthur, I am a man of my word, and finish it I will.
So, while Lindsay lets Tyra Banks and America's Next Top Model calm her in the next room, let me start out by saying that she (Lindsay) is a really great cook. She is creative in the kitchen and usually she comes up with healthy and delicious meals for us, but tonight she wasn't having any of that. So she followed her inner chubby-kid, and she made us a dinner of microwavable Lean Pockets, cottage cheese, and soda. We followed this entree with a popsicle dessert.
While it may not have been her finest culinary hour, it did lead us to an important discovery, which is the real reason behind this post.
...Lean Pockets make you lose weight!!!
Just check out this link, and you'll find out for yourself why dozens of folks are already telling the conventional school of thought behind healthy eating, to, "Go To Hell!"
Tales from the Scales
I mean, come on! Lean Pockets made one of these dudes loose 282 pounds, and now he can fulfill his "life-long dream". There's even a gal on there from my very own hometown of Chandler (ages 2 - 12), who lost 100 lbs, and that hits home for me.
Thank you Lean Pockets, and thank you Lindsay.

This, of course, is a picture of Lindsay before her lean pocket/cottage cheese dinner made her cranky.
***P.S. -- the bottle of wine in the background was a gift from our Phoenix landlord, Ko Yu. For the last year and a half this unopened bottle has been displayed in each of our homes as a reminder of his great landlordship.
***P.S.S. -- Sorry for the strong language in this post (My fantasy basketball league has already threatened me with disciplinary action for my inappropriate language on the message boards this season, and the season hasn't even officially begun yet. I guess that it's just my way.) But since my Mom would be the most likely reader to be offended by this, and she's already told us that she doesn't read our blog anymore because of my R. Kelly post, I decided to just go for it.
***P.S.S.S. -- Mom, if you have for some great reason decided to give this blog a second or third chance, then I do sincerely apologize.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Mrs. Kitty

May I apologize to the faithful viewers of our blog (if we have any) for our absence. We have been moving this last week. And with all of the joys of moving there is the joy of decorating a new house and finding a new place for Mrs. Kitty.

Oh my, have I not introduced you to Mrs. Kitty? Pardon me. I came across Mrs. Kitty in a discard bin at Ross. I know what you are thinking, they have a discard bin at Ross? Yes, yes and a double meow-yes. At first she did not catch my eye because she is not hideously outrageous or tacky, she is more subtle and refined and that is how she won me over and practically stole the $2.39 out of my pocketbook.

As you can see she is not just another cat dressed as a human she is a cat dressed as a lady of the Renaissance. Other then wanting to dress my walls with great art, I bought Mrs. Kitty because everyone hates her and people who do not know me well become embarrassed for me when they see her hanging on my wall. She also makes an interesting statement, not about herself but about people who create the market for animals dressed in human clothing. You know who you are, you are probably watching season 1 of Ellen on DVD right now.

Mrs. Kitty

Mrs. Kitty's close up

me getting pumped up to find Mrs. Kitty a new home.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

B is for Beautiful, B is for Brad

This is our friend Brad. We like Brad. He is loyal, he is a civil war buff and he looks great in a grey tank. We went to dinner with Brad and his wife Shanna. We had a good time, but we had an even better time once Brad asked us if we would be interested in seeing him in his grey tank. As a rule, we are always interested in seeing a man in any color tank. So this one is for you Brad, dinner was great but you were even better.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

Party Monster

Colton's Birthday Party Highlight Reel

The birthday boy

The birthday cake adorned with big game animals

and 3 giant candles from the 72 hour kit standing in for birthday candles

Kallie: blind fold removed, no mercy!

Kallie, Colton and "talk to my agent"

this is exactly what it looks like. Matthew is stringing Colton from a tree.

And this is cade. He came to the party dressed as Willard from Footloose.

Friday, October 12, 2007

Walker Texas Journal

First of all, let me just say that the USA network owns the market on daytime television, period. Why on earth would anyone need to watch any other channel from 8am to 4pm? USA has it all.
As for Walker today, it was a doozy, and it pretty much rewrote the whole history of the church. It all started when the gang of Rangers got involved in a fierce family history/genealogy session. After a while, they couldn't control themselves any longer and they decided that they had to tell the tale of one of Walker's ancestors. I think his name was Cooper, and he was from the exact same cut as Walker. They both love boots, hats, chaps, horses, and perfectly executed roundhouse kicks. The only noticeable difference between the two is their patrol territory. While Walker works the modern day Dallas streets and pastures, Cooper was all about marshaling the wild west. The differences stop there... in fact, Cooper and Walker looked exactly the same, and they executed their martial arts in exactly the same way, too. It felt like science to witness such awesome DNA being passed down through the generations.
But to make a 60 minute story short, I will get down to business. Cooper met up with a strange but charitable group of plains crossers, called Mormons. He defended them from vicious mobs of hillbillies, and he must have even found time to apply their make-up and to do their hair, because those pioneers looked good. Eventually he led them to the Salt Lake Valley, and then rode off into the wilderness, while all of the men and women stared at him longingly. Then the narrator sang a rockin' country tune about Cooper and the Mormons, which I'll be looking for in the next edition of the primary songbook.

In addition to the journal entry I'll try to include a Texas Ranger highlight clip. This one is brought to us via the worlds second biggest (second only to Ty's dad) Walker fan, Conan O'Brien. In this clip Walker does some substitute teaching at the school of Hard Knocks.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Happy Birthday Adrianne

When someone special in your life has a birthday you ponder the ways in which you can celebrate them. Well, for you Adrianne, this was the only way we knew how. Feliz Cumpleanos, hermana!
* we apologize for the quality of the video but not the dancing, that was strait from the heart.

Monday, October 8, 2007

A Day In The Life: Vol. 1

This is a journal of photos from sometime last week. It runs through a very typical day in the life of a male homemaker, and a "valley of the sun" travel enthusiast.

Watching Real Talk with Ty. --Mesa

Takin' it to the streets. -- Scottsdale

Ty takes a very hydrated cruise. -- Scottsdale

Lunch at Paradise Bakery with all of the other Mormon housewives. -- Tempe

Reserved parking. -- Phoenix

At the thinking spot, trying to get pumped up for the season. -- Phoenix

Still thinking and getting pumped. -- Phoenix

Feeling even more pumped up after acquiring the new Band Of Horses album a few days before it comes out in the stores. -- Phoenix

Doing homemaker things like vacuuming up a scorpion. --Mesa

Doing male things like dissecting another scorpion. -- Mesa

A Day in The Life ...cont.

We continue on into the night with a male homemaker, and a "valley of the sun" travel enthusiast.

Dinner at Sauce, with the Mrs. -- Mesa

Catching up with the world in print. -- Mesa

Ending the night on a high note with Ryan and the King Of Kong. -- Tempe

Sunday, October 7, 2007

King of Kong: Fistful of Quarters

For everyone who has been waiting for the seedy underbelly of competitive arcade gaming to be exposed, the wait is over! King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters documents one mans quest to become the worlds best Donkey Kong player and another mans fight to retain his title. I am not making this up.

Meet Billy Mitchell: Reigning King of Kong since 1982. 1982 also happens to be the same year he encapsulated his entire look. This hot sauce mogul has been enjoying the fruits of arcade game domination and will do anything to defend his reign as the King of Kong.

Meet Steve Weibe: 8th grade science teacher who is about to find out how hard he will have to fight to take the title of King of Kong. And he also learns the age old lesson that associating yourself with a man that is known as Mr. Awesome will always come back and get you in the end.

Meet two satisfied movie goers who were painted to their chairs as they watched the epic battle between good and evil unfold in arcades across the country.

If you haven't had your mind blown in a while, then I think it is time. The trouble of finding an independent theater in your area playing this film is worth it. We loved this movie, mostly due to the shock that Billy Mitchell is a real member of society and not a character of Ben Stiller's. the plot is rich with deciet, wierdness and a 70 year old man who wears a referee uniform and runs an organization called twin galaxies. These are the things that make movie magic. check it out here.

Friday, October 5, 2007

Real Talk

Last Saturday, Radiohead dropped a bomb and forever changed the music industry when they surprise announced that their new album will be released in just a week and a half, and that the price is up to each customer.
As of today, that Radiohead bomb is looking more like a bottle rocket, because the one and only R. Kelly just caused nuclear winter with his youtube only video for Real Talk.
I think I speak for America (North and South) when I say that I don't even know if R. Kelly is even human anymore. The music he makes is no longer just the voice of our generation. The music he makes is our generation. I mean, this guy has a career arc that defies math. Sure, he's always had some success, especially with hits like Bump and Grind and Ignition (remix), but ever since the Trapped in a Closet series dropped, his arc has been straight vertical. And speaking of Trapped in a Closet, we all would have been accused of smoking fools gold if we'd thought that he could ever touch that level of artistic genius again. So R. Kells did the only thing he knows how. He filled his blunt with pure pyrite, and he puffed and puffed until things got straight magical again. And that's when Real Talk was born.
Real Talk is actually just a bunch of real talk. How real? So real that he has to apologize in advance for how much profanity he uses, but he does note that profanity is just part of the real talk that happens when you are arguing with your girl. The only problem with this video is that he keeps it a little realer than real, which is way too real for this blog. Brown Sugar will not fully endorse the human language when the level of talk gets this real, and that is why I haven't posted the youtube video directly on this site. However, we will still loosely endorse it, and that's why you can click on a link to be taken to the video right here: Real Talk
Some people probably can't handle this level of real talk, but the way that I look at it is that if I was in a fight with R. Kelly on the phone, he could cuss me out all day and all night as long as he did it with that soulful croon. That man could sing his way into or out of anything.

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Roid Rage

Gym goers beware! I read an article in a very informative and credible news source, People Magazine, about an altercation that took place between two men in a spinning class. The victim was enjoying his spinning class the only way he knew how, by groaning and shouting out, "You Go Girl!" When he was approached by another male in the class. A few words were exchanged and then the angry spinner picked up the loud man and his BIKE and threw him against a wall. This story is shocking, mostly because these men were not celebrities and I have no idea why they are in the pages of People magazine. The only non celebrities allowed are usually women who kill their husbands or lose a lot of weight. However I am grateful that this story crossed my path for I am a noise offender in all aspects of life, especially the gym. I even utter positive reinforcement to myself out loud when I work out like the aforementioned, "You Go Girl!" Thankfully I have not been to the gym in months or else I could have been the victim of a steroid raging man in a spin class.

this is what I imagine the enthusiastic spinner looked like at the time of his attack.

This is my father. He taught me about noises; the noises you make when you feel good and the noises you make when you feel bad and the noises that will make other people uncomfortable.

Inaugural Blogural

Allow me to reintroduce ourselves.......
We are hilarious. We love to wear jewel tones and take photos of ourselves. Why wouldn't we blog?